It's A Matter of Convenience
by Maiwyn Hearts
Summary: A mysterious organization is killing high ranking military members. Will Edward help the military stop this or will he succumb to the bait of the Philosopher's Stone that is offered to him as exchange for his...services?
1. Ed Learns What Went on While he was Gone

.::It's A Matter of Convenience::.

Maiwyn Hearts

-and-

Solunaterr

(_Chapter One_)

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A/N: Before I go into this whole tale of awesome-ness, there are a few things you need to know:

1. **WE** are very proud to display the results of **our** hard work, Solunaterr and I.

2. Hi. Please read this, we spent hours writing up the storyboard for this. ((sweatdrop))

3. Uhm… I'm not sure if co-authored fics are accepted into the fanfiction community, I mean- I've seen them a few times…

4. Some of the stuff in this fic is going to be mangaverse, so if you haven't read every single little page of FullMetal manga there is, do so now, because my friend over here is a FMA manga otaku.

Disclaimer: I don't own FullMetal Alchemist. If I did… I'd make Ed wear a brown jacket from Billabong (which I, unfortunately, don't own TT.TT), slip-on shoes with wacky colored socks, a leather wrist-band watch, and a newsboy hat (or whatever they call them).

Summary: Edward is pulled into an assassinating organization during a mission and is pursued by the military via a hired mercenary. Will he clear his name in time? Or will he be killed in the process?

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General Hakuro wasn't aware of the danger aimed at him. He was currently visiting Brigadier General Victor Valken, the BlackFire Alchemist, in South HQ. Just seeing how operations were going.

The 28 year-old Brigadier General lounged in his luxurious leather chair, his ice-blue eyes staring holes through the older General. His dirty blond hair hung over his eyes and even went to stick out slightly on the sides. The ridiculously young Brigadier General was famous for his skills in utilizing flame and bending light to create intimidating and fear-inspiring attacks. He was also infamous for his expert skills with women, rivaling those of Colonel Roy Mustang.

"So, what do you wish to discuss, General Hakuro?" Valken asked, twirling a pen around his fingers.

"I was inspecting the area with my escort, and so I decided to see how the operations are going in South HQ. Have you-" Hakuro was cut off as he stared at the reclining Brigadier General.

Living up to his reputation, Valken had a leather-bound notebook in his hands, intently screening its contents intently. "Let's see… I've a romantic candle-lit dinner with the beautiful lady Yuna tonight, Miss Lockheart invited me to a play on Saturday, and I of course cannot ignore the ravishing Miss Matsumoto… Also, I have yet to win the hearts of the ladies Kairi, Ashelia Dalmasca, Naminé, Lulu, Rosalie Hale, and Alice Cullen… But how to fit the equally beautiful Quistis, Rinoa, and Aerith Gainsborough into my already crowded schedule?" (If you know every single character mentioned there, congratulations, you've watched every anime I adore furiously, read almost every book I love, and played every game I play or hear about.)

General Hakuro was not amused. "Brigadier General, this is not the time to be concerned with your love life. We are in a crisis with the killings of the Generals visiting South HQ and I will not tolerate your infernal ramblings about women-"

Valken raised his icy eyes up to Hakuro's. "What was that?" The air seemed to crackle. The state alchemist raised his left hand and waved it casually.

A flash of cold, black lightning blazed past the General's left ear, leaving a stinging cold burn after it. Hakuro took a step back, terrified of the now merciless Brigadier General.

"What… what do you think you're doing, Brigadier General!? How dare you raise a hand against a superior officer! I should have you court-martialed-"

Valken stopped him with his ice eyes. "Did you know, sir, that there are extra nerve connections in my automail left arm? And that with the transmutation circle inscribed inside its metal, with just a casual wave of my arm I can manipulate the air's temperature, hardness, and also bend light to create lightning? There are things far worse than death, General Hakuro; and as it so happens, I can make that a reality…" Valken took a step forward-

And Hakuro staggered out of the room, too terrified to stand up for himself.

Valken smirked.

"Have a nice last night alive, General Hakuro. Farewell."

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"Daaaaaamn…" Edward mumbled, staring up at the Central Headquarters building. He closed his bright gold eyes and heaved a sigh. "I hate summons."

His little brother, Alphonse, stood next to him, his large armor body blocking out the hot Central sun, letting the shorter Elric enjoy the shade (not really, of course. He was too busy griping about the summons from Colonel Mustang.).

"Big Brother, you shouldn't-" Alphonse was interrupted by a high-pitched and highly noticeable _meeooww…_ coming from inside his armor.

"Alll… you're hiding another cat inside your armor, aren't you?" Ed groaned, slapping his forehead with his left hand in exasperation. "I've told you over and over again: STOP PICKING THEM UP! Your armor isn't an orphanage for cats!"

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"The Colonel will see you now." Ed entered Mustang's office and saw nothing but pillars of paperwork.

Literally.

Colonel Roy Mustang's head just barely peeked out from the piled up paperwork (which, if he wanted to, he could simply burn up using his ignition gloves) to look at the newly arrived alchemist.

"FullMetal. As you can see, I'm busy right now. Come back in a year or two."

"This is what I get for coming all the way from the Briggs Mountain Range just to see you? That's nice, Colonel." Edward replied, a derisive smirk on his face. "Looks like your paperwork has finally caught up to you."

"Oh. Right. Why I called you here." Mustang not-so-carefully cleared off his desk, using his hands to slide the mountains of papers off the surface of his work table. The paperwork unceremoniously fluttered to the ground. The Colonel focused his coal-black eyes on the FullMetal Alchemist.

"Are you aware of the string of murders occurring in the Central, South, and East HQs?"

"Um… I was in a snowy, mountain range that was almost completely cut off from civilization for weeks."

"Right. In that case, I'll just have to fill you in." Roy said. The dark-haired Colonel fished out a page out of one of the lakes of papers on the floor.

"First off: All the victims have been in the military. Generals, Brigadier Generals, a few Colonels here an there…"

"Sounds dangerous. For you." Edward snorted, sounding like his usual, sarcastic self.

"For you as well, FullMetal."

"I'm not a rank of any importance."

"The murders follow a simple pattern: Brigadier General, General, Colonel, Brigadier General, Colonel… " Roy trailed off.

"Then State Alchemist, regardless of rank."

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MH: Lalalalalaaaaaaa!!!!!!! Hah!!! I'm sorry if some of you were expecting a new KH fic… but I'm experiencing serious writer's block, so I decided to start this monster up in order to perhaps gain some ideas. Sorry my readers ((cries))


	2. Roy's Niece, Ed's Rage and a Mission

AN: Hey everyone! It's Solunaterr. I wrote this chapter so the style might be slightly different from the prologue. Thanks to everyone whose been reading this story. I hope you like this chapter!

_Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist. If I did, I would give Maiwyn Heart's cousins complete control of Edward Elric._

(A note from Maiwyn Hearts: …You are soooooooooo evil… By the way, you don't mind me beta-reading this, do you?)

Chapter 2 

"Uncle Roy! Uncle Roy"

Roy groaned inwardly. His niece had finally arrived.

A young woman ran into the colonel's office and threw herself into the chair in front of her uncle's desk. She had black wavy hair tied up into a bun with brown eyes and a smirk that matched Roy's.

She dressed in all black every day without fail. No one was really sure why. Her commanding officers had tried numerous times to get her to wear the military uniform but the headstrong woman refused. She knew she was too valuable to be kicked out over something as trivial as a uniform.

Two things were always definite in the morning. One, the woman would have a massive cup of coffee in her hand. Two, she would have a couple of new cuts or injuries somewhere.

Roy looked up from his paperwork and sure enough, the cup was in her tattooed hand and the scrapes were on her cheek. The tattoo on her hand was a transmutation circle. She was the StoneSilk alchemist, and turned stone into silk so it could me used in combat. Very useful if she was fighting with her fists as she normally did.

The colonel sighed. "Who did you beat up this morning, Rhina? How much damage did you cause?"

"No one important. This guy gave me a weird look so I had to hit him a few times," the Lt. Colonel said calmly. The coffee hadn't quite kicked in yet.

Roy leaned back in his chair and replied, "I should tell someone that you've been fighting again. It looks bad for the military."

"If you do, I might just have to use this," his smirking niece said and pulled out a small silver key.

Havoc smiled and stifled a laugh. Only two people in the entire world could control Colonel Roy Mustang. Rhina, unlike Riza, was capable of using far more subtle methods than a gun.

"What are you going to do with that? Scratch me?" Roy smirked back.

"No, or course not. This is the key to a special file drawer that contains every single embarrassing picture that I have of you. Now, you don't really want those posted all over the office bulletin board, do you?" the Lt. Colonel replied.

"How many pictures?"

"5,280. I counted last week."

"Do you have the ones from the family Christmas party two years ago?"

"Naturally."

"What else?"

"A few of you and Hughes making faces at generals behind their backs. The bills for all the phone calls you make to women using the military phone. Oh, and your diary."

"Did you forget anything?"

"Oh, yea. A couple of you drooling in your sleep. A few baby pictures of you acting stupid. Every single school picture. You know, when you still had that dorky hairstyle."

"My hair wasn't dorky! All the girls loved it!"

"Which girls were these? The blind ones?"

"No! My hair was the best in the school!"

"Well, why don't I post these on the board and we can let the other soldiers decide."

"Fine. You win. You are the evilest girl I have ever meet."

"Only to you, Roy."

"Don't you have work to do or something?"

"Don't you, dearest uncle? You better get started before Riza comes in and starts shooting at you again."

Roy quickly began to look at the giant heap of paperwork on his desk again. He really did not want to be shot today.

"Well, I would love to watch you bore yourself to death, but I have far more important and interesting things to do," Rhina said and skipped out the door and down to the library to do more research on who knows what.

"Havoc, why doesn't she ever have any real work to do?" the colonel asked.

"I don't know sir. Maybe it's because every one's afraid of the perky, coffee loaded Rhina," the soldier replied back.

"Colonel, are you doing your paperwork?" asked Riza's voice from the hall.

Roy's eyes went back to the reports on his desk before he was shot.

After Lunch 

Rhina had come into her uncle's office to do the little paperwork that she had, and had promptly fallen asleep at her desk.

After being woken up for the fifth time by Riza, Roy decided that it wasn't fair that his niece could sleep but he couldn't.

"Lieutenant, why do you wake me up, but not my niece?" the colonel asked politely.

"You're my responsibility. She's not," Riza replied without looking up from her work.

"Havoc, get me a bucket of ice water," Roy ordered.

"Why? Can't you get it yourself?" the soldier complained.

"Havoc, I am ordering you to get me a bucket of ice water. Do you want to be court marshaled?" the colonel answered.

"Fine," and he walked out the door muttering to himself.

He retuned in a few minutes with the bucket and Roy took it from him. Then he walked calmly over to his sleeping niece's desk, and dumped it on her head.

Her head went up and her hand reached for her uncle's throat. When she saw who had disturbed her, she punched him instead of choking him. Her dad wouldn't like it if she killed his brother.

"What was that for?" the enraged colonel asked.

"I would think that was obvious," A dripping wet Rhina replied.

"I should report this attack on a superior officer," Roy said angrily.

"You keep forgetting about this," she said and pulled out the silver key again.

"Just finish your paperwork," he sighed.

Rhina looked down at the small stack of paper on her desk and smiled.

"I'm glad we finally understand each other, Uncle."

Roy responded with a grunt.

Unfortunately for Roy, Edward Elric chose that moment to walk into the office. He calmly walked over to the chair in front of the desk and sat down.

"What kind of noise was that colonel? It sounded like there was a pig in here," the blonde alchemist said, staring at both the colonel and the drenched girl in the room.

"Who's the shrimp, Uncle?" asked Rhina.

Ed jumped up and launched himself at her to begin his usual rant, but Rhina was faster. She grabbed one of the many rocks on her desk and transmuted it into a long length of silk, which she used to lasso Ed before he even got to her desk.

"Colonel, who the hell is this!?" Ed shouted. No one had stopped his ranting before.

"Ed, this is your partner for the assignment I told you about yesterday. Meet Lt. Colonel Rhina Mustang, my niece. She's also called the StoneSilk alchemist," Roy explained.

"Rhina, meet Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist," the colonel said to his niece.

"Why wasn't I informed about this mission before now?" Rhina demanded.

"Because I forgot to tell you this morning," Roy replied.

"What am we supposed to do?"

"You and Ed will infiltrate J.A.S.P.E.R., the organization that has been killing high ranking military personal and attempt to destroy it. We have information that there is a spy in the military leaking information. If you can not destroy the organization, find out who is the spy."

"Let's get this over with," said Ed.

AN: Roy just can't win, can he? Women just keep getting the better of him! Please read and review!


	3. The Fortress and Rhina on Coffee

A/N: MH here. Here's the third chapter of 'It's A Matter of Convenience!!!

By the way: I can guarantee you right here and now that Ed will not have a pairing with any OC in this story. EDWIN FOREVER!!!!!

Disclaimer: I do not own FullMetal Alchemist. If I did, I'd make Ed wield a _**PLASTIC SWORD**_ instead of automail. XD XD XD XD XD XD XD. Beat _that_, Soluna!!!!

(Soluna: That was low, Maiwyn. Just to let all of you readers know, we are both mentally stable. We're just having a bit of a disclaimer war here. Nothing to worry about.)

(_Chapter Three_)

Roy looked over the papers scattered over his desk once more. "One more thing." Rhina and Edward stopped in their tracks.

"I'm officially naming FullMetal the assignment leader."

"What!?" Rhina exclaimed, incredulous. "You can't give _Major_ **Shrimp** authority over me!"

"_WHOAREYOUCALLINGSOSMALLHECAN'TBECALLEDANASSIGNMENTLEADERCUZHE'SSOTINYHE'DBESQUISHEDBYTHEOPPOSITIONINTWOSECONDS!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?_" Ed screamed, steam billowing out of his ears (translation: Who are you calling so small he can't be called an assignment leader cuz he's so tiny he'd be squished by the opposition in two seconds!?)

Roy rolled his coal black eyes in annoyance. "Comparing your judgment with Edward's, his reasoning is much more polished than yours… which says something about _your_ own logic that needs help." He explained casually, smirking at the now steamed Lt. Colonel.

"I'm only one rank lower than you, Uncle!! _ONE_!!! I'm clearly the one better suited to be the head of this assignment-"

"_Uncle_, huh?" Ed smirked mischievously (the last time Rhina referred to Roy as 'uncle' was when the height-challenged alchemist was ranting, and so was not paying attention). "Seems that nepotism doesn't affect you, Colonel."

"Actually, I chose you because you're not usually drinking gallons of brain-muddling coffee." Mustang replied. "If not for that, I would have chose Rhina in an instant." Now Edward was the one fuming mad alongside Rhina.

"I've got not time for useless bickering. Just go. The faster you finish this assignment, the better." Roy waved them out of the office.

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The next day, Ed and Rhina (Al had been forbidden by Mustang from coming) boarded the train that the Colonel had scheduled for them to go on.

So, to be honest, Ed had no idea whatsoever where they were going. The blond alchemist dropped into the bench, sighing. Rhina sat across from him, a determined frown on her face as she drank her beloved coffee. Edward looked out the window, bored out of his mind.

Almost minutes later it seemed, Rhina started talking.

"So you're called 'FullMetal', huh? How come? Why d'you have such a short fuse? Why're you so short? Don't you drink milk?" Ed decided to ignore all the questions, but the last two questions pricked his ears.

"_WHO'RE YOU CALLING SHORT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!_" Ed exclaimed, his face suddenly bright red.

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"So um… where _are_ we, 'leader'?" Rhina asked sarcastically, crossing her arms.

Edward's eyebrow twitched, it was the fifth time the Lt. Colonel had asked the question, making for a very angered Edward Elric.

"_For…the…__**last**__…time…I…don't…__**know**__…_" Edward growled, gnashing his teeth together.

"Oh, well you could've just said that the first time."

"I _did_ say that the first time!!"

"Whatever."

The two state alchemists were interrupted in the middle of their conversation by a scrap of paper thrust into Edward's hand by a suspicious looking man in a long coat, his eyes hooded. Ed could make out a bit of spiky blond hair peeking out of the hat he wore.

"Um…" Ed murmured, looking at the small folded scrap with puzzlement.

"Just open it!!" Rhina exclaimed in exasperation. Edward unfolded the paper.

'_Jasper is in the forest to the far west._' It said simply, not giving any other directions.

"…Well, since this is the only lead we have, I'm guessing… WEST!" Rhina yelled in her coffee-induced hyper period. Ed quickly shut her up with a whack on her head courtesy of his automail arm.

"Shut up, or you'll give us away!" Ed hissed, "What if the organization has spies set up at the station?"

"I'm sure I can beat em' to a pulp."

"… You drink too much coffee."

"So they tell me."

"This is pathetic!"

"Yeah, you are."

"_Not me, this conversation!!_"

"Really? I was under the impression that you were bashing yourself."

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Two hours later, after heated argument, Ed and Rhina had finally caught a cab to go west (after paying 7000 sens). Their ride dropped them off around fourteen miles from their destination.

Edward and Rhina picked up their small suitcases and started trudging forward through the lush and treacherous forest.

After what seemed like days of walking (even though it had been four hours), a building appeared just barely visible through the thick green. An hour later, Edward and Rhina reached the fortress. It was composed almost entirely of granite, though most of the walls were covered in vines and other types of greenery.

"…Geez, just put a sign here that says 'J.A.S.P.E.R Organization building', will ya?" Ed mumbled, staring at the headquarters, complete with armed guards, attack dogs, and ominous music.

Before Rhina could jump into a fight, Ed grabbed her by the back of her collar and jerked her back behind the wall of vegetation they were hiding behind.

"Don't be stupid." Ed growled.

"But-"

The two state alchemists were interrupted by a sudden hail of bullets soaring past Edward's ear.

"Hey! I think there's someone peeking behind the trees!" One of the guards shouted.

"Well, looks like we've been found out!" Rhina said happily, placing her hand on the ground and immediately transmuted a length of silk from the rocks on the forest floor. The Lt. Colonel dove straight into the fortress's guards, and the sound of punching and kicking was soon heard.

Edward abandoned all sense of order and logic and dove straight into battle as well. Five minutes later, 20 guards, 5 attack dogs, and an orchestra were knocked out by the formidable pair.

"Okay, now that that's done…"

"INTO THE FORTRESS!!!!" Rhina yelled, zooming into the fortress.

"Hey, wait a minute- Argh!" Edward groaned and followed his partner into the headquarters.

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MH: Well!? Waddya think?????

…Soluna, beat **that**!!!! Just kidding.

Just in case, if anyone missed the authoress' note at the top, Ed won't be paired with any OCs in this fic, kay?


	4. A Psycotic Show of Power

Maiwyn: Hiya!! Soluna wasn't feeling too motivated with this particular chapter, so I wrote it instead! Okay? By the way: the more 'action-y' side of me is going to start to show up from here on out. If you've read my KH fic 'REWRITE', then you'll know that I'm mainly humor, but not anymore! Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! ((coughcough)) Moving on...

Solunaterr: I actually wrote the first part, up to "The lack of people made it rather creepy." I just couldn't let Maiwyn take all the credit even though she wrote most of it.

Disclaimer: I don't own FullMetal Alchemist. If I did, Ed would be the star of every drama production at my school, and Roy would be the head musician who writes his own music. I also don't own 'Artemis Foul', the obvious reason being he's based on a book character. XD.

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Once inside, the two alchemists were met with another large group of guards. Again, mainly due to Rhina being so hyped up on coffee, they dispatched them all. Ed was rather amazed at what Rhina could do with just her hands, feet, and a piece of silk transmuted from the ground. He almost felt sorry for the guards. Their training clearly did not include what to do against a hyper, silk wielding woman. They were completely unprepared.

Two hallways led away from the entrance hall.

"Which one should we take, _O_ _mighty leader_?" Rhina asked with a heaping of sarcasm.

"How am I supposed to know? There's not a sign or anything and 'Uncle Roy' didn't give us a map of the castle," Ed replied.

"Where in the world would he get a map? I don't think they would be handing them out on the streets," she shot back.

"Okay, we'll just go right. If we don't find anything, we can always backtrack and go left instead," he decided.

The pair walked quickly and sort of quietly down the hallway for a few minutes. The lack of people made it rather creepy.

"This is almost _too_ quiet." Edward whispered.

"Yeah. I miss beating up people."

Ed threw her a strange look.

"…What?" Rhina asked, clearly puzzled.

"Nothing." Ed replied, rolling his golden hued eyes.

At that moment, the pair of state alchemists entered a large room, with a lone woman at the center.

"Welcome, Edward Elric." The woman greeted him, a wicked grin splitting her face.

On her neck was a red gem about the size of his thumb. The gem sparkled the color of blood. Edward's golden eyes widened as shock reached him.

"Rhina." He whispered.

"Hmm?"

"Get out of here. Now."

"_What!?_"

"I said scram."

"No way."

"Just do it. I'm mission leader."

"I don't think so."

"Or I'll have Mustang court martial you for disobeying a direct order from a mission leader."

Grudgingly, Rhina turned around and sped off into the opposite direction, leaving the blond haired state alchemist and the mysterious woman alone.

The woman standing in front of the blond state alchemist looked amused. "You let your only ally here go, alchemist." She said, taking a step forward.

Without warning, Edward transmuted his automail into a blade and charged forward. The woman jumped back, the blade missing her by a centimeter.

"How…" Ed whispered," How did you get that Philosopher's Stone!?"

"How I got it is none of your business. Now, how you might _obtain_ it… that's a matter that we could discuss." The woman smirked, stroking the red gem hanging from her neck.

"Hand it over." Ed demanded, outstretching his left hand.

As if that would work. Instead, the woman clapped her hands and placed them on the ground, creating millions of sheets of rock that hovered in the air.

'_Oh sh-_'

The woman waved her hand and the sheets flew across the room at blinding speeds. Ed braced himself and put his arms in front of his face, ready to feel the impact.

Nothing came.

When Edward looked around, the sheets of rock had landed on either side of him. The woman smiled a wicked grin.

"I think… we understand each other now."

"Don't think…" Edward growled, a grimace on his face," that I'll be intimidated by your psychotic show of power!" The state alchemist thrust his automail blade at his opponent. She, in turn, placed her hand on the ground and transmuted a razor-sharp rapier from the ground. Edward slashed again, and the woman blocked his blow with ease. Ed swerved around and struck, this time being repelled a few feet away by the tip of the woman's weapon. Not willing to be defeated, Edward clapped his hands together and transmuted a large spike from the floor, aimed at his challenger. She dodged the rock with ease and then raced forward to aim another blow at the state alchemist. Edward narrowly escaped the arc of the rapier's tip, but doing so left him vulnerable.

The woman then promptly took the opportunity and thrust her rapier into his left shoulder.

The pain was almost instantaneous, and Edward could feel the warm blood seep out of his shoulder, soaking his shoulder red. He felt himself falling, landing on his injured shoulder.

A cry of pain escaped his lips.

A red splash painted the floor.

The bitter sting of the rapier mercilessly tortured him.

"It may be a psychotic show of power, but I think you're adequately defeated now, right?"

"Who…are you…?"

"I am Harmony."

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Rhina suppressed the impulse to rush in and pummel the strange Harmony woman to a pulp. She had hidden behind the edge of the entrance to the room. She was frozen in place, unable to move. The thought of Edward, _the_ Edward Elric (though short), being defeated was an impossible pill to swallow.

Now a new person, a man, stood next to the Harmony woman, one with raven black hair and eyes that spoke of years of thieving gold and an intellect far beyond the age he appeared to be.

"I heard the sound of fighting, and I thought I'd have a look." The man was saying. "I know how much you love rapiers."

"That's sweet, Arty; but I think the fighting is over, dear."

"I see you've left the boy alive. Would you allow me to strike the last blow, sweetheart?"

Rhina stiffened, and the heel of her boot crunched a bit of the concrete-stone floor.

"No, I want him alive, Artemis." Harmony purred.

"That's a shame. His blood has such a nice, healthy color. It'd be wonderful to see some more."

"Eventually, my dear, eventually. However, I'll need his blood inside his body for now. You'll have to wait a little longer, my love." Harmony cooed.

"Alright. You know I love it when the blood just pours into that particular pattern. The sight of it just makes me want to…" Artemis sighed and leaned on Harmony's shoulder.

"I know, my love."

Then Rhina could feel the woman's eyes turn towards the room's entrance.

"Please tell the military that… I have two of their precious state alchemists under my command now."

Without any thought, Rhina fled as fast as she could, ignoring the scream of pain that came from the room.

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In his last bits of consciousness, Edward's foggy vision darkened, and he heard only scraps of conversation.

"…thought I'd have a look…"

"…the fighting is over…"

"…the boy alive…"

"That's a shame…"

He then heard one last sentence. "Please tell the military that… I have two of their precious state alchemists under my command now."

Then he felt the rapier embedded into his shoulder pulled out roughly, another cry of pain, and then nothing.

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When Edward finally opened his eyes, he found himself in a well-lit room. His wounded shoulder was bandaged. He also noticed the cold temperature of the room and the almost suffocating thickness of the blankets laying on top of him.

The injured state alchemist turned his head-

To come face to face with a pair of sharp green eyes covered by shaggy black hair.

"Hi!" The owner of the eyes chirped, waving enthusiastically. The only other thing that Edward noticed about the man was that he wore a corked phial of blood around his neck.

"Who the hell are you?" Ed asked, his voice hoarse.

"Oh, me? I'm Artemis Foul, your personal jailer!"

"What!?" Yelling hurt his shoulder.

"Oh, don't get me wrong, the other prisoners are all dead and rotting in their cells, so you're lucky to have company!!" Artemis grinned, which sent a chill up Edward's spine.

"Where is this?" Edward asked, glaring at his jailer.

Artemis looked puzzled. "Um… Oh yeah!" His emerald green eyes brightened as though remembering the answer to a difficult problem. "We're in the Briggs Mountain Range! This base is number… 93 I think…" He tapped his finger on his chin, as if thinking of the exact number of bases there were in existence.

"Alright, but- what am I doing here?"

"You're being nursed back to health!" Artemis beamed. Edward was almost taken aback by his child-like disposition.

"I meant 'what am I doing here alive'."

"Oh. Well, you're gonna be our new assassin!!" Artemis grinned as if he was announcing the best news of Edward's life.

MH: Well, there's chapter four!!!! Soluna, it's in your hands now!!!


	5. Rhina Hatches an Evil Plan

AN: Solunaterr here. Okay, a lot of Rhina in this one. We'll go back to Ed soon. This one is kind of short but the next chapter is my favorite so far.

_Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. If I did, I would make Ed 70 years old and wear an ugly gray jumpsuit. Oh, and black stuff would fall from the ceiling. _

Rhina ran as fast as she could back to the train station and bought a ticket for the first train to Central. She needed to report back to Roy as soon as possible. They needed to save Ed, and this organization was a lot stronger than the military had expected.

Once on the train, the young alchemist couldn't sit still. Every person on the train looked like Harmony or Artemis. She felt something she had never felt before. Rhina felt fear. She was actually afraid of this J.A.S.P.E.R. organization.

As soon as the train stopped she leaped off and ran as fast as she could to her uncle's office. They couldn't touch her there. Military personnel were swarming around the place.

"Uncle Roy! Uncle Roy!" Rhina said as she burst into the office.

"Do you feel the need to make a dramatic entrance every time you come in here?" the colonel asked.

"They have Ed! Harmony and Artemis captured Ed!" she yelled and ran up to Roy's desk.

"Wait. Who are Harmony and Artemis?" he asked.

"The leaders of J.A.S.P.E.R.! Harmony pierced him through with a rapier with barely any effort! Do you know what this means?" Rhina asked and grabbed the front of Roy's shirt so she could shake him.

Roy carefully removed Rhina's hands from his uniform and said, "I need you to tell me what went on exactly. Then we can decide what to do."

Rhina sank down into a chair and told the colonel about everything that happened in the castle.

"And then she said 'Please tell the military that I have two of their precious state alchemists under my command now.' " Rhina finished.

"This organization is more powerful than we thought," Roy said.

"That is what I've been trying to tell you! One person captured Ed with no problem," Rhina retorted.

" 'Two of their precious state alchemists' That confirms our suspicions that there is a traitor in the military. It appears that we have two goals here. We need to find this spy, and we need to find out what they plan to do with Ed and why they are killing military personnel."

Riza then stood up from her desk and said, "If I may make a suggestion, sir, I think the Lt. Colonel should go home now. She has been through a lot in the past few hours. We can continue this discussion tomorrow."

"Rhina, I order you to go home. Do not leave the house until tomorrow morning. Get a good night's sleep and try to think about something else. Come to the office tomorrow and we will plan on how to rescue Ed," Roy said.

"But Uncle-"

"Go home Rhina. I can't risk you collapsing or going into shock. Get some rest."

"Fine."

Rhina stomped out of the office and walked home. Now she was filled with anger instead of fear. Her uncle had no right to order her out like that. She was the only one that had seen the actual castle. They needed her.

The young alchemist remained angry all the way home and throughout her lonely dinner. As she looked down at her plate of food, Rhina suddenly had an idea. It was the perfect way to get back at Roy. Her uncle had told her to think about something else so that's exactly what she did.

It was amazingly simple. All Rhina had to do was make a phone call. She went to bed going over the plan in her head and fell asleep.

The Next Morning 

Rhina woke up and went to the small kitchen and ate a quick breakfast before dressing in her uniform of black. After making the important call, she was off to the office.

She was perky on the way to work. The young alchemist stopped to get her daily cup of coffee and didn't even look twice at the gang of teenagers eyeing her from the alley.

The StoneSilk alchemist walked into the office and Roy looked up. She had a huge smile on her face and literally bounced into the room. The coffee shouldn't have kicked in yet. That was weird.

Rhina skipped over to her uncle and sat down. Roy didn't notice any new injuries. What was with her today?

"So dear Uncle, I was thinking that you and I should have dinner tonight. We need some Uncle-Niece time. My treat of course," Rhina said.

"What restaurant?" Roy replied leaning back in his chair.

"Sakura," she answered. Sakura was one of the best places around. He couldn't turn down a free meal there.

"I think I could make it. What time?"

"I made reservations for 8 o'clock. Will that work?"

"Sure. I'll meet you there."

Perfect. That part of the plan worked flawlessly. Now to find Riza.

Lunch 

Riza got her lunch and began to walk over to the table where she normally sat with the rest of Colonel Mustang's subordinates. Before she got there, she noticed Rhina waving to her from a table across the cafeteria. She walked over and sat down.

"Why are we sitting over here today?" she asked Rhina politely.

"Because I want to ask you something and I don't want the other soldiers to get jealous," Rhina replied.

"Okay . . ." Riza said with a puzzled expression on her face.

"I was thinking that we should have dinner together tonight. Just us girls. We are the only females in the office and we haven't really gotten a chance to get to know each other," Rhina proposed.

"Where?"

"Sakura. It would be my treat."

"I'll come. What time?"

"8 o'clock."

"Okay. I'll meet you there."

Perfect. Her evil plan was in motion.


	6. Rhina Puts her Evil Plan into Action

AN: Soluna here. Sorry it's been so long since the last chapter. School just started up again so things have been kind of hectic. Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter. It's my favorite so far. If you didn't know already, I am a huge RoyRiza fan. Just a reminder, RoyRiza is the only active pairing in this fic. Don't expect any EdOC or anything. Maiwyn and I are rather against that.

_Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Maiwyn, remember that it's Win__**r**__y, not Win__**w**__y._

Rhina walked inside the fancy restaurant and was led to her reserved table. She was a few minutes early put that was essential to the plan.

"I'm meeting someone here. Her name is Rhina Mustang. Has she arrived yet?" Rhina heard Riza ask from the front of the restaurant. She waved to the Lieutenant, and Riza came and sat down. Now came the tricky part.

"Hey Riza! I need to go to the bathroom. If the waiter comes, tell him I would like a cup of coffee and a water," Rhina said.

The Lt. Colonel walked to the bathroom put didn't go in. Instead she hid behind a large potted plant to watch the upcoming events.

"My niece reserved a table for us. Under the name Mustang? Is she here?" Mustang said from the door. Rhina hoped that Riza couldn't hear him.

This part of the plan relied on the staff of Sakura. Hopefully, they wouldn't mess up.

Roy was led to the table where Riza was sitting.

"Here you go sir. Miss Mustang should be here shortly," said the waiter.

Roy had such a look of surprise on his face when he saw Riza that Rhina almost burst out laughing and gave away her hiding place.

"There must be a mistake. This is not my niece," said Roy.

"No sir. There is no mistake. This is the table that Miss Mustang reserved. However, she did not say that she would be sitting here. You can ask her that when she comes back," the waiter said with a smile on his face. Almost the entire staff knew about Rhina's evil plot. Everyone thought it was hilarious.

"I suggest sir, that you sit down and wait," the waiter said and walked away.

Roy sat. Rhina decided that this would be a good time to come out. She didn't want anyone leaving.

"Hey Uncle!" the young alchemist said as she skipped over to the table.

"Rhina!" both Riza and Roy said.

"What is going on here?" demanded Roy.

Rhina looked at both soldiers with a fake look of confusion. Of course she knew exactly what was going on.

"It seems that there has been some mistake. Since there isn't enough room for three here, I'll go sit over at that conveniently empty table over there. You two stay here and have a nice dinner. Of course I'll still pay for all three of us," she said and skipped away before either of them could object.

"We've been set up," Roy said, still slightly confused. He had no idea that his niece was so devious.

"Did you just figure that out, sir?" Riza replied sarcastically.

"Do you think we should just go ahead and eat?" the colonel asked.

"Yes. She said she would pay for it, so why waste a good meal, sir?" Riza responded.

"Since we're not on duty, will you please call me Roy?"

"No, sir."

"Why not?"

"I believe that a soldier should remain professional at all times. He or she needs to set an example for the rest of the population."

Then the waiter came up and took their orders. He was followed by what looked to be a small army of men in tuxedos. Two candles were placed on the table and lit. A rose in a beautiful crystal vase came next. The next waiter came with a bottle of champagne and two glasses. Rhina planned everything out.

In the candle light Roy noticed what Riza was wearing for the first time. Instead of her usual blue uniform, she had donned a long flowing blue dress with thin straps. Her hair was pulled into her usual clip at the back of her head but shone under the dim lights of the resturant. She really was very pretty.

Roy had known that he was in love with for a while. Everyone knew that. He had liked her because she was Riza, not because of her looks. The colonel hadn't really seen her this way before.

"Um, would you like some champagne?" he asked nervously. Suddenly he didn't know how to act. Should he act like he did on his other dates, the suave, enchanting colonel? Or should he act like he was at the office, the leader yet somewhat lazy?

"That would be nice," Riza replied in her usual formal tone. She didn't want the colonel to know what she was really thinking. The Lt. Colonel had loved him for months but she knew he didn't like her. His constant dates with other women proved that. Why did Rhina have to put her in such an embarrassing situation?

Then Roy poured the drinks and brought up the subject of work so they talked about that casually until the food came.

After several minutes of quiet eating, Roy put his fork and knife down.

"Riza, I've been wondering about something the entire meal and I need the answer. Why are you always so formal with me?" the colonel asked. He had taken a risk. Some women would have hit him for asking such a personal question. Others would have muttered some random response that had absolutely nothing to do with the actual question. Roy hoped that Riza would answer honestly.

"I already told you. I feel that-"

Roy cut her off by saying," I know that's not the real reason. Do I intimidate you or something?"

"No. It's just that if I act emotionless and professional all the time, then no one knows what I'm thinking," she answered and then covered her mouth. In her haste to prove her superior wrong, she had blurted out something she really didn't want to tell anyone. She knew exactly what this would lead to.

"What are you thinking?" Roy asked.

Riza was right. She knew he was going to ask that question, and of course she didn't want to answer.

"You don't want to know. It would make things very awkward between us," the female soldier replied. That was more than she wanted to tell but hopefully it would let him know he needed to stop asking questions before she did something stupid.

"What if I tell you what I'm thinking first? Then will you share the knowledge of your thoughts with me?" the colonel asked.

"Maybe. It depends on what you're thinking."

Roy took a deep breath and said, "I am thinking about how beautiful you look in the candlelight. About how much I admire you. How much better you are than all the other women I date."

Riza smiled and leaned in toward him.

"Now it's your turn what are you thinking?" Roy asked. By her response he could figure it out, but he wanted to hear her say it.

"About how much I admire you and how you much I hate all the women you date."

Then Roy leaned in and took her head in his hands. The soldier leaned in and kissed the woman who was much, much better than any of the brainless women he wouldn't be dating for a long time.

In the background, the couple could hear Rhina jumping up and down and screaming.

Roy pulled away gently and said, "Excuse me. I must go and see how much coffee my dear niece has consumed. I'll be back in a minute."


	7. Ed is Hired

Chapter 7

MH: Maiwyn here after two chapters of great Roy-ness! Now on to Ed. I'm sorry Soluna but I had to put some uh, ((coughcough)) _language_ in it. Well, the rating _is_ 'T', after all, but I don't think uh, '_Listerine Thursday_' would appreciate that…

Disclaimer: If I owned FullMetal Alchemist, I'd dress Winry in a 'Mythbusters' (I don't own) shirt that says 'Plausible', knee-length black lace-up boots, and black pants and armed with 'Twilight' and 'New Moon' (I don't own) books. ((snickers)) And as for Ed… refer to chapter 1, I think. ((snickers))

Soluna: First of all, I don't really care about the language. Second, my boots are not knee-length. They only reach about half-way up my calf.

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"You're going to be our new assassin!"

Ed heard the words, but they didn't register.

"You actually think… that I'd actually kill people for you!?" Edward whispered incredulously.

Artemis nodded with a beaming smile.

"_And which whack-job came up with that load of crap!?!?_" Ed jolted up from the bed, bringing a throbbing pain to his wounded shoulder. Artemis looked puzzled.

"Why, my dearest Harmony, of course."

"Oh, so that crazed rapier wielding bitch thinks she can tell me what to do-" He was suddenly cut off from his rant by Artemis who had put a razor-sharp blade to his throat. His green eyes were cold.

"Don't you _ever_," Artemis growled, pressing the knife against the vulnerable skin," call Harmony such a despicable, un-fitting word ever again!" Edward felt the sharp edge break his skin, a thin red line appeared on his throat.

"Now, now, Arty. Be good." The woman known as Harmony strode into the room, her long red-brown hair tied back behind her head. Artemis' cold green eyes turned back into the innocent grass-green color they were a moment before.

"B-but dearest! He called you a-"

"I know, Arty, but you must be kind to our guest."

Artemis grumbled. "Yes, my love." Harmony stepped over to where Ed was.

"Now, what do you have to say for what you've said about me, Edward Elric?" Harmony asked, smirking.

Edward grimaced, and then smirked just as arrogantly as the woman's had been. "I meant every word."

Harmony struck him across the face. Her face was a stone mask.

The state alchemist rubbed his sore cheek. "You don't hold back, do you?" He asked, still smirking.

"Hmph." Then she smiled an emotion-less smile that sent shivers down Edward's spine.

"Artemis," She said, turning her back on Edward," get him ready. I'll be waiting in the arena."

Half an hour later, Artemis had gotten Edward dressed in brand new clothing (which he despised, coming from the fact that they were from 'Arty' and Harmony.), and had put fresh bandages on his shoulder.

"You're going to need them." Artemis had said.

Two minutes later, he was in the 'arena', a large round room devoid of any decorations save for a large window letting in light from the ceiling. Harmony stood in the center, a long and thin rapier already in her hand. Edward realized what he was going to be doing.

Fighting a half-crazy rapier wielding maniac in a room with no escape.

_Damn._

Harmony then pointed the silver rapier at him. Edward himself transmuted his auto-mail arm into its usual blade.

"You _do _know this is where I'll convince you that there is no argument, right?" Harmony asked, swishing her rapier around in the air, a painful reminder of what had happened to Edward's shoulder not too long ago.

"You _do_ know this is where I'll kick your insane ass, right?" Ed asked right back, bracing himself for any type of impact.

Harmony charged forward, slashing her deadly rapier towards Edward with blinding speed. The blond alchemist dodged too late, and the tip of the weapon scratched the cloth of his shirt apart.

'_Damn, my reflexes are too slow!_' He thought, gritting his teeth and blocking his enemy's next blow. Each hit from Harmony's rapier that was deflected off of Edward's right arm made vibrating clinging sounds as the diabolical woman landed her tool of pain down on the auto-mail again and again.

After a while, Harmony jumped back. Ed was puzzled as to why, but when he saw the fractured surface of the rapier, he grinned.

"Looks like auto-mail wins, huh?" Ed asked triumphantly. Harmony only frowned and threw the weapon aside.

"That's enough for now. You'll make a nice assassin." That's when Edward glared.

"I'm not going to be anyone's assassin, especially not yours." He growled.

"We'll see about that." Harmony sniffed, and strode over to the door. Edward unwillingly followed, as he was poked in the back by Artemis.

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Harmony sat down in the plush chair in the room that she had led Edward to, and gestured to the much plainer chair across from her. Edward didn't take a seat.

"Very well, then." Harmony said. Artemis brought his love a cup of tea.

"Thank you, dearest." She purred. The woman took a sip of the brew and gave the cup back to Artemis to hold.

"Now, there is the matter of persuading you to join the J.A.S.P.E.R's cause." Harmony began.

"No way in hell."

"Ah, you speak too soon, state alchemist."

Edward knew she had some kind of plan behind her eyes. "Really?"

"Yes. I _do_ know about your friend, Winry Rockbell."

Edward stiffened. He had heard this kind of threat many times, but hearing it once more still made his heart clench in fear. "Wh-what about her?"

"She is living in Rush Valley, is she not? It would be all too easy to stage an, an _accident_, if you will. She does, after all, work in an auto-mail workshop with potentially dangerous equipment all around her-"

"_Shut up!_" Edward was trying to keep his cool, but the thought of Winry dead was a hard scenario to keep bottled up.

Harmony looked mildly surprised. "Hmm… Ah! There is also your brother, Alphonse."

"So?"

"My dearest Arty is a master marksman, correct?" Artemis grinned childishly and blushed. "It would be a simple task to fire the shot that would enter an empty spot in his armor and scratch that frail blood seal, if not tear a hole clear through it. I can have the town of Risembool turned into a bloody smear on the map. I can destroy all you have dear to you in a matter of _hours_, Edward Elric."

Edward stood in his spot, unable to move or think. She knew _everything_ about him, from Risembool to Alphonse's blood seal. He summoned up the strength to look at her in the eye. "Why me?"

"Hmm?"

"If you have all these resources to wipe out the opposition, why do you need me?"

Harmony paused. She tapped a finger on her chin. "That's a very good question, Edward. I'll tell you why," She took the cup of tea from Artemis and took a sip, then gave the cup back to him, "we need someone in the military to continue our operations. We need someone who has expert alchemical skills and knowledge of how the inner workings of the government function."

Edward took a shaky breath. "And what makes you think that I'd join your stupid cause?"

"Why, I'd think the answer is obvious." Harmony tapped the Philosopher's Stone around her neck, glistening vibrantly. "I gathered this from an old friend. He owns mines in the south. It's easy enough to make it look like a cave-in. Oh yes, this stone would definitely be enough to restore your limbs _and_ your brother's body."

He didn't know what to do. He had what he had been searching for right in front of him. But he'd have to kill people for it. But if he didn't… Al, Winry, and Risembool would be…

Was there a choice? Of course there was, there was always a choice, right?

Edward's eyes widened, and inside, half of him grinned, half of him grimaced.

With a shaking voice, he finally spoke. "I…I'll do it."

Harmony was ecstatic. "_Brilliant_!!! Artemis, please show him the way to his new quarters. I'll brief him on his mark later." The woman practically squealed with joy. Artemis almost did the same.

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"Here's your new room! There are clothes in that cabinet over there." Artemis chirped gleefully. The room was luxurious, with a bed with plush covers and pillows that looked almost painfully fluffy. A large window overlooked the glacial mountains of the Briggs mountain range.

After Artemis left, Ed practically fell onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling with a sigh. After about five minutes, Ed decided to change the ripped shirt he currently had on. Inside the cabinet that Artemis had referred to were extra shirts, jackets, pant. Inside the bottom drawer was an extra pair of boots.

Edward didn't want to accept any kind of hospitality offered, and so he grabbed a black sweater from the top drawer and replaced his ripped shirt with the new sweater.

Almost immediately after, the state alchemist heard a rap on the door.

"We're ready to tell you about your first job!" Artemis said enthusiastically. Edward kept his face expressionless as he followed the black-haired man to another room in the fortress.

Harmony waited inside the chamber that Artemis had led Edward to. She slid a picture on the small table in front of her.

"I thought we'd start you out easy. He isn't a General, Colonel, state alchemist, or anything important, so no one will suspect you."

Edward stood there silently. He didn't say a word.

"I'll arrange for transportation to Central in the morning, so you'd better rest up."

Edward turned to leave, when-

"Edward, the picture. It would be rather embarrassing if you killed the wrong person." Ed took the picture wordlessly and left.

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MH: It may have been too hasty an ending… ah well. I _still _can't believe I have to do another chapter after this.

…This agreement still is worth something…((coughcough))

Solunaterr: I have put a little bit of extra information about Rhina on my profile page. Go check it out. It's at the very bottom of the page.


	8. A Very Annoying Girl

Chapter 8!

MH: 8!!!! That's a lucky number! Yay!! By the way, there WILL BE NO EDXOC PAIRINGS. At least not in this part of the trilogy… ((coughcough)) there may be some slight EdxOC in that one… although Soluna may not like it…

Disclaimer: If I owned FullMetal Alchemist…Um… Uh… Oh! I know!! XD.

((coughs)) Okay, here we go: ((in scary voice)) There…would be… a BOOKMARK OF ED WITH THE BILLAGONG JACKET ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WITH PEOPLE BUYING IT FOR A DOLLAR EACH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!! WITH THOSE TAN KNEE-LENGTH SHORTS!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THE SLIGHTLY _**FRILLY**_ SOCKS!!!!!!!!!! AND THE SHOES!!!!!!!! AND THE **PLASTIC SWORD**!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! By the way, I own none of those things.

Soluna: That was a rather long disclaimer. Those socks were frilly, weren't they?

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_The Next Morning_

"I still can't believe I have to get to the train station via _hay cart_." Edward grumbled.

The man pulling the cart turned his head, angered. "Hey, it's a _straw_ cart you idiot."

"Same difference." After another hour of grumbling in the cold, Edward accepted his fate and quit whining. Another hour passed, and the _straw_ cart reached the train station.

Once there, Edward carefully mapped out his route of travel. "Let's see… from here to Central is around… so I'll have to take another train from that city there… then I'll get to Central… Okay…" He bought his ticket and boarded the train.

_Not Too Far South_

She was woken by the ring of the phone. It had taken years to purchase, so there was no destroying of this particular gadget. After three rings, she finally took the time to pick up the receiver.

"Hello?"

She listened.

"What's the password?"

She was silent for a few moments.

"Alright. What's your tip?"

She listened, and then a wide grin broke out onto her face.

"A rumor of a job in Central with a big pay-off? Sounds fun. Thanks." She hung up the phone and opened the shades covering the light of the room.

Piercing golden eyes squinted at the brightness.

_Train To Random City_

Edward wondered for the thousandth time if he'd made the right decision. It was, after all, dangerous business he was treading in, after all. He sighed and stared outside as the landscape changed from icy and snow-covered to the slightly warmer climate a little further south.

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Edward got off the train at the unnamed city and headed immediately to the ticket booth.

"One ticket to Central." He said.

"That'll be 500 sens." The ticket seller said. Edward handed him the money and took his ticket. The train wasn't due for 30 minutes, so he found a bench and waited.

After what seemed like _two_ hours, the train finally rolled into the station. The doors of the cars opened. Edward got up from the bench, picked up his luggage, and went inside.

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"One ticket to Central, please." She said.

"Uh… 500 sens." She traded her money for her ticket and turned around.

'_The train's already here!? Damn!_' She thought. She grabbed her bag and sped over to one of the car's open doors and hurried inside. She didn't notice that she was going too fast and rammed into someone.

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He had been taking his own sweet time in finding an empty seat. No such luck, as all of the seats were almost fully packed.

'_You'd think there'd be just _one_ free seat here…_' He thought to himself. As he was passing another one of the open doors of the car, a blurring shape slammed into him, sending luggage flying.

Edward got up and brushed himself off, grimacing.

"Geez…" He mumbled. He turned to look at the one who'd rammed into him. She was still sitting on the train's floor.

"Don't you know not to run onto a boarding train?" He asked.

"Well, sorry." The girl said sarcastically as the train slowly came to life. She looked up at the state alchemist. Her golden eyes blinked once. Twice.

"Um…"

She looked similar to him. She had the same hair, except she wore it down, and the same eyes. The only thing was… she was a girl, and she was… a… head… taller… than… him. Argh…

The girl stood up and scratched her head, an expression of amused frustration on her face. "Ouch… didn't expect _that_…" She turned around. "Where's my bag…?"

Ed coughed.

"Hmm?" She asked.

"Isn't there anything to say to the person who you just _bashed_ into!?" He asked.

"Um…" She tapped her finger on her chin, sarcastically portraying thought. "…No. Unless it's apologizing for you being in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"It is! Hey wait-"

"Okay. I'm sorry that you just _happened_ to be standing at that particular spot at that particular moment in time. There, you happy?"

"No!"

"Sheesh, you want me to get on my knees and beg for forgiveness for whatever I did?"

"Yeah!"

"Uh, sorry, but no." She smirked.

Edward was fuming. He picked up his bag, turned on his heel, and marched in the other direction, looking for a place to sit.

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When he finally found a spot, he immediately dumped his bag onto the bench opposite him and sighed. Thinking about his next task, getting to Central and carrying out his plan in utmost secrecy, Edward pulled out his small notebook to scribble down some notes.

'Get to Central.'

'Lay low in case word has spread about Harmony.'

'Contact military.'

'Contact Al.'

'Contact

He didn't want to write that annoying last name. If the Colonel ever found out about Harmony and Artemis… he'd never let him hear the end of it. Edward sighed, closed his notebook, tucked it in his pocket, and stared out at the scenery rolling past his window. In moments, he fell asleep.

The moment he woke, a pair of golden eyes stared him in the face.

"Hey."

"Waugh!!"

"Geez, you know I'm flattered about the whole mimicking me thing, but could you make it less apparent?"

"_Excuse me!?_ I think _you're_ the one mimicking here, buddy!!" Edward yelled, an eyebrow twitching in irritation.

"Tseh. Don't deny it; it's okay to admit admiration."

"WHAT!?"

"Hm? It's about time I saw a building." the girl sighed.

"Geez, you've got some attention span. What's your name anyway?" Ed asked.

"Jaede."

"Uh-_huh_. Jade, huh?"

"Jaede is spelled J-A-E-D-E."

"What kind of whacked spelling skills do you have!?"

"It's _my_ way of spelling it, okay?"

"Right, of course." Ed rolled his eyes. There was silence. For three seconds.

"So, why're you heading to Central anyway?" Jaede asked, resting her chin on her hand.

"What's it to you? I don't tell every copycat I see my business."

"Tseh. What else do I have to do on this train?" She asked.

"Um, leave me alone?"

"No thanks. I'd rather hang out with my look-alike here." Jaede smiled. Angry red marks appeared on Ed's face.

"You're annoying."

"People say that."

"Grrrrr…"

An hour later, after the train had stopped in Central station, Ed hurried out of the train, partially out of a hurry, and partially from a frantic need to get away from the ever-calm, yet ever-annoying Jaede. He pulled the hood of his coat over his head, so as to disguise his face in case anyone recognized him.

"Now… to find this Captain Tomas…"

TBC 

MH: Hah! And there you have it!!!! By the way, THERE WILL NOT BE ANY EDXOC IN THIS FIC… I am quite opposed to Ed x any of the OCs that I've created so far (Sorry Soluna, but Rhina _was_ my fault.)


	9. Murder, a detective, and lack of coffee

AN: Soluna here! This is the longest chapter I have written so far but it has a lot of important information. I hope you like it! Also, I want to that all of our reviewers, especially Harryswoman. Thanks so much for reading!

Disclaimer: I don't own FullMetal Alchemist. If I did, um, um well I'm out of ideas so that's all. Roy rules!

(Maiwyn: No, no, no, no, no! _**EDWARD IS BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!! EDWARD IS BETTER!!!!!!!!**_ Noooooo! One day, Soluna, EDWARD ELRIC SHALL RULE THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Ed walked carefully down the street, trying to look inconspicuous. He made his way to the closest hotel and rented a room. He would spend a few days here while searching for his mark.

He picked up the phone sitting on the bedside table and dialed the number for Winry's house. Al was staying there since Roy ordered him to stay home.

"_Hello_?" said Granny.

"Um, Granny?" the blonde alchemist asked.

"_What is it, shorty? Break your automail again_?"

"Don't call me short, you micro hag! I did not break my automail!" Edward exclaimed, regretting making the call.

"_What's the reason for calling, then? You never call in the first place._" Pinako said. Edward was sure he heard someone-Winry, probably- yelling in the background.

"_Is that Ed on the phone? He broke his automail, didn't he!? Granny, lemme on the phone so I can give this loser a piece of my mind!!_" Winry shouted.

"Uh, uhm, Winry, now just wait a sec-" Ed stuttered, not prepared for whatever storm of insults or rants about automail that Winry had in store for him. He waited while Granny Pinako reasoned with Winry. A few minutes later, Pinako was back on the phone.

"_Okay shrimp, what's up?_"

"I need to talk with Al. It's really important."

"_Sure. Just a minute. Al! Get your metal butt over here!_" Pinako yelled.

Ed waited a few minutes until he heard his brother pick up the phone.

"_Ed? Is something wrong_?" Al asked. He hadn't expected Ed to call for a few more days.

"Listen, Al. I found the Philosopher's Stone."

"_You did!? I'm on my way! I can't believe this, did you really find the Stone!? That's amazing, Brother!! I'll be there as soon as possible!_"

"No Al. You need to stay in Risembool and watch over Winry. If the military comes, don't tell them anything. Don't even say that I called you."

"_Ed, what happened?_"

"I'll tell you when I get out of this. I can't say anything more right now. I'll see you soon," Ed said and hung up the phone. He held his head in his hands. Hopefully neither the military nor J.A.S.P.E.R. would get Alphonse or Winry. He was in way over his head.

Edward spent the next three days carefully colleting information on Captain Thomas. He checked all of the records he could without being too obvious. Using his state alchemist privileges was a sure fire way to get him in jail in the case that Roy or the rest of the military knew about Harmony. Rhina had certainly told her uncle about Harmony's words. The entire military could now be on the lookout for two traitors.

By the end of the third day, he had everything he needed including the Captain's schedule. He would make his move when Thomas left work. Apparently, he didn't leave until after dark so it would be easier to make sure that no one was watching.

The most difficult part would be making sure that there weren't any witnesses. He had a plan that he thought would work but it relied on to many variables. If it didn't work, he would have wasted valuable time and a second plan would be much harder to put into action. Right now, though, he didn't really have any other ideas or choices. He would have to try it.

At 7:00, Ed left the hotel and made his way to Captain Thomas's office. He would follow him home until he got to the perfect spot to put his plan into action.

Just as he reached the office doors, a man about 30 years old and in military uniform walked out. From the picture, Edward knew that this was his target.

The young alchemist knew the route that the man would be taking. It led past an alley that was actually a short cut to Thomas's house. Normally the man didn't take it since he wanted to avoid the gangs and criminals that tended to lurk around those kinds of places. But Edward had the feeling that the captain would go through it if his family were in danger. His colleagues reported him to be quite the family man.

Ed followed Thomas until he reached the dark alleyway. Then the young alchemist ran up and started to yell, "Captain Thomas! Captain Thomas! Your house has been raided! Your wife and little Johnny are in danger! They say that it's the organization that's been killing military officials!"

The man immediately ran off down the alley without asking who his young informer was. Ed hadn't expected him to but had his watch ready to prove his identity as a member of the military.

As the Captain sped down the dark alleyway, Edward silently followed him, keeping his footsteps light and inaudible as Thomas raced towards a home that was still perfectly safe. For now.

A nice house finally came into view. Thomas ripped the door open, not bothering to even close it behind him.

"Felicity! Johnny!" Thomas shouted, searching the empty house for his wife and son.

"They're not here, Captain Thomas." Thomas spun around. Edward had followed inside, closing and locking the door behind him. "You really should get a habit of locking your doors."

Thomas' eyes bulged. "Y-You! You're that wanted… person!"

Edward raised an eyebrow. "_Person_? Great vocabulary there."

"Where is my wife? My son!?"

"Calm down. They're still at Artem's house. Listen, I've got a few things to discuss-"

"I'm not discussing _anything_ with a criminal!" Thomas growled, pulling a knife from his belt.

'_Not good!_' Edward thought. He assumed a defensive pose. "Look, Captain! I'm not trying to kill anybody, I'm just trying to clear my name, dammit!"

Thomas lunged, the knife cutting the air cleanly. Edward barely escaped as the blade scraped the sleeve of his jacket.

'_This isn't going well! Damn! Time to resort to plan D-90-37!!_' Edward thought, and clapped his hands sharply. He then smacked his hand on one of the walls of the house, planning to transmute it into a nice, chaotic looking hole when Thomas rushed again, interrupting him in the midst of transmuting the concrete. A few jagged spikes were the only result of Edward's alchemy.

"Look! I'm only trying to-ow!- get my name-atch!- cleared with the military! Not-whoa!- murder anyone!" Edward said, parrying Thomas' slashes with his automail arm, wincing and crying out when the knife found a weak spot in his defense.

Captain Thomas pushed him back to one of the walls, the very same one that the alchemist had attempted to transmute.

"This is the end of you!" Thomas grunted victoriously, and raced forward, knife ready for the kill. Edward dodged just in time-

-for Captain Thomas to impale himself on the spikes on the wall. A spurt of blood flew out of the man's back, splashing against Edward in the process. Blood dripped out of the corners of the Captain's mouth.

"…Damn…you…" Thomas whispered before the light died out of his eyes.

There were two thoughts on Ed's mind: the first was that the guy was dead. Crud. The second: He needed to scram. Now.

He quickly bashed open the door of the house (after re-transmuting the spikes on the wall back to normal and setting down Thomas' corpse down, of course) and was about to get the hell out of the scene when he was stopped by a horribly familiar blue jacket.

"Edward!" Roy exclaimed, his normally cool composure completely shattered.

A rather long stream of rude and impolite words flew from Edward's mouth. It took almost three minutes for both of them to regain their normal dispositions.

"So my niece was correct. You are working for this J.A.S.P.E.R. organization," Roy said, glancing at the splash of blood on Edward's shirt. Edward cursed himself over and over. Why had he decided to wear a white shirt? _WHY!?_

Ed just stood there with a look of horror on his face. He could not believe that he had been caught already. Now he would never be able to bring Al's body back. He had failed him. If anyone else (except Envy) had been standing before him, he would have sunk to his knees and begged for mercy but he had to keep his dignity in front of the colonel.

"So you caught me. Go ahead. Arrest me." Ed challenged. "It won't matter that the whole damn incident was an _accident._"

"I'm not going to arrest you. At least not now." Mustang said after a moment of hesitation.

"You're not? Why? A catch like this could get you promoted."

"Ed, I know you're not a bad person. You don't want to kill these people, even if it _was_ accidental, so I'm going to give you another chance to think this over. You have two days to get the hell out of here and away from these killings. I don't want to see you again for a very long time."

Ed stared in shock at the dark haired man. Just when he thought it was all over, he was handed another chance. He would have to stay with Winry for a while until this all blew over, but that would be okay.

"Oh, and one more thing Ed," said Roy as he began to walk away. "If I hear of any more murders even remotely similar to this one, I will make it my personal responsibility to track you down and throw you in jail. Don't make the same mistake twice."

"You'll make it your personal responsibility? Does that mean that you'll actually fill out the paperwork and not make Lt. Hawkeye do it?" Ed asked with a smirk.

The colonel walked away without giving a response to the short alchemist. He was going to have a tough time covering this up, but it would be worth it.

Edward turned around and sped off in the other direction, throwing his bloodied shirt aside, because no one wants to be seen wearing a white shirt stained with blood.

One hour later, Roy was back at the crime scene. After some careful lying, acting, and promising he had managed to make his group the only ones in charge of the investigation, he had immediately sent Riza to work finding a very important sheet of paper. The phone number of Duo De Viginti, private eye.

Roy had met the detective the previous year, when investigating a break in at the East side offices. Duo was perfect for this case. He was paranoid, inept, and pompous. Everyone would think he was making progress while he actually got nothing done. The actual murder would never be found.

A car pulled up to the house and a thin, dark haired man about 20 years old stepped out.

"Roy! How are you doing?" Duo asked while shaking the colonel hand fiercely and keeping his face perfectly serious. There was nothing funny or soft about this young man. He was all business. Even when he was talking complete gibberish, Duo thought he knew everything, which made him rather annoying at times. Roy smiled to himself. This was the perfect choice.

"Not bad. Are you ready to examine the body?" Roy answered.

"To the point, I see. Yes, yes. Lead me to this poor man." the detective said.

The pair walked over to the deceased captain and Duo leaned over to get a closer look.

He straightened up and asked, "Do you have any leads yet?"

"Well-"

Roy was cut off by a loud argument at the entrance to the house. It appeared that a young lady was attempting to get through the guards that were keeping civilians away from the crime scene.

"Don't you tell me that I can't go in there! Do you even know who I am!?" said the young woman.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but no civilians are allowed to enter this house right now," the guard said patiently.

"My uncle is in there! Let me see him right now!" After that statement, Roy knew exactly who was forcing her way through. Some how, his niece had found out about this. Now Roy was sure he'd never hear the end of it.

"Ma'am, if you don't leave right now we will have to forcibly retrain you. Please vacate the premises," the guard pleaded.

"I will not leave! Let me through!" shouted Rhina and slid into a fighting stance.

"Okay, lady. I warned you. Now I have to do my job," the man said and reached out to grab Rhina's wrist.

"If you will excuse me for a moment, I need to rescue that poor man from my niece," Roy explained.

"Your niece is one of the guards? And if you don't mind me saying so, that citizen is a woman, not a man," Duo said, confused.

Roy laughed despite the seriousness of the situation. "No, my niece is the woman trying to get through. I'll be right back."

The dark haired alchemist walked over to the guards, leaving Duo with the body.

"Sir, if you would please let this woman through," said the colonel.

"Uncle!" shouted Rhina and stopped beating the guard with the piece of silk in her hand. The other end was busy squeezing off the circulation of blood to the poor guy's arms. Roy could tell it hurt by the man's winces.

"Colonel Mustang! So this woman is really your niece?" asked the guard while rubbing the particularly red spot on his arm.

"Yes. This is Lt. Colonel Rhina Mustang or the StoneSilk alchemist. I'm sorry for all the trouble she has caused you," answered Roy.

"No problem at all sir," said the guard with a salute.

Roy began to walk back to Duo with Rhina in tow. When the detective saw them coming back, he rose from his kneeling position next to the body.

"Duo, this is my niece, Rhina. She is also a state alchemist and works in my office," explained Roy.

Bowing to Rhina the detective said, "Pleased to meet you Miss Mustang. The name's De Viginti. Duo De Viginti."

Fighting back laughter, the colonel turned to his niece and explained, "Duo is the detective working on this murder. Hopefully, he will be able to provide us with a list of suspects in the next few days."

"I have examined the body thoroughly and just need to collect some samples before I leave," said Duo.

"Rhina, why don't you stay here with the detective while I go back to the office to um, finish some paperwork," stated Roy. That would be perfect. With Rhina there, the investigation would be even further behind. He could also get out of the house's vicinity, which was beginning to give him the creeps. He had just seen a 16 year old boy murder some one there. Accidentally. It would take a long time to get that image out of his head.

"Why uncle!? I was going to get coffee!"

"You are going to stay here. That's an order."

"Fine," pouted Rhina. How on Earth was she going to last without her coffee? She hadn't had a cup for over three hours. She felt the headache coming already.

Roy walked calmly out of the alleyway and prayed that Ed wouldn't do anything else stupid.

AN: Another OC! I know it's driving some of you crazy but I promise this is the last important one. (There might be some unnamed guards, but that's all.) Oh, and if any of our readers can read Latin, try to figure out what Duo's name means!

(Maiwyn: …You… have **no** idea how much beta-reading and editing it took for this stupid chapter. Soluna: Well, if you would have just written the chapter like you said you would in the first place, you wouldn't have had to fix it!)


	10. A Rather Odd Scene

Chapter 10!!!!!

Maiwyn: Well, while _SOLUNA_ kept delaying chapter 10, I've been here slaving away, editing like crazy. ((sigh)) Oh well…

Soluna: Okay, first of all, I've had to do the last three chapter even though I was only supposed to do 1 1/2 so don't complain about editing. Also, since this is still technically my chapter, I should have the disclaimer. I'm being nice and letting you have it. So no more complaining! Also, everyone who has read this story before, please go back and reread the end of chapter 6. Some of the dialogue has been changed to make the story make more sense later. Nothing huge but it will be important later.

Disclaimer: I do not own FullMetal Alchemist. If I did, Ed wouldn't just be on the posters/sticker sheets/game manuals/DVD covers on my wall. He'd be real. But he isn't. So there. XD But Soluna can still dream about her Riku (KH, which we don't own)…. XD XD (I am so dead). And dude, Roxas is da _**bomb**_. Go Roxas!!! (I do not own KH either.)

Jaede walked into the military offices and looked for some sign pointing to Colonel Mustang's office. As soon as she took a step into the area, a man with dangling cigarette in his mouth approached her.

"Hey, gorgeous, you lost?" He asked, practically leaning over her. Jaede fixed him with a menacing, golden glare. Her hands instinctively moved to the multiple kunai strapped to her belt.

"Unless you want to be skewered by no less then 30 kunai knives, I suggest you **back away** **now**."

"Now, now… don't be like that." The annoying man said, but he backed away all the same.

"Where is Colonel Roy Mustang's office?" Jaede asked (commanded).

"Right. Take a left, then head there till you hear a woman shouting at someone about paperwork, then turn right. Hold on just one sec'." He said, and ran ahead of her. Without blinking, Jaede followed him, shaking her head and wondering what the hell was happening to the world.

**--**

"Colonel!!" Havoc yelled, bursting into the room. Roy, who was carefully (and quietly) opening a drawer, looked up.

"What, Havoc?"

"There-there-there's this _girl_ looking for you!"

Roy coughed. "Well, I _am_ Roy Mustang after all."

"No, you idi-I mean, she's got friggin **knives** strapped to her belt!!!"

Roy's eyes widened slightly. He finished opening his drawer and pulled out what he'd been seeking. "Right." He put his flame gloves on, snapped his fingers, and set the pile of papers alight.

"Colonel…"

Uh-oh.

**--**

Jaede could hear gunshots and yelling even before she was within 50 feet of the door. Something bad was going on. This could jeopardize her chance at the job. She really needed the money.

Jaede stormed into the office, her kunai drawn. The sight that greeted her was one of the oddest she had ever seen. A dark haired man was hiding (seriously, hiding.) behind his desk chair while a woman with blond hair clipped behind her head held a gun pointed towards him. A girl about her age whose features were remarkably similar to the man's was standing on her desk with a long piece of silk in one hand and a rock in the other. A few men were sitting at their desks watching the scene with rapt attention.

"Sir, I can not believe you did it again! How could you be so stupid?!" asked the woman and fired a round into the wood of the desk. The hiding man cowered lower. Pathetic.

"And you burned my coffee beans! Uncle, how could you do that?! How am I supposed to stay up long enough to work on the investigation with Duo now?" yelled the girl as she transmuted the rock in her hand into another piece of silk. Jaede wondered how a piece of silk would be more deadly than the rock. Another fascinating thought to occupy her time. Something to consider when she actually was allowed to have some leisure time.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to snap with your gloves on? That's the third stack of paperwork you've burned this week!" yelled the woman.

The man looked up to see Jaede standing the doorway with knives drawn and ready for battle.

"I'm sorry Riza, but I can't exactly work on the paperwork right now. See, Jaede Snowe had arrived. We shouldn't let her wait," he explained.

"Fine, I'll go and get new copies of that paperwork. You'll do it before you leave tonight. Even if it takes all night," The woman, Riza, threatened.

"But we have a date tonight. You want me to do paperwork instead of that?" he asked, incredulous.

Riza nodded and walked out to the office. The man stood up, clearly thinking the danger had passed. He turned out to be wrong.

"Uncle, you still need to replace my coffee! I need my caffeine! COFFEE!!!!! You'll get me that coffee even if it takes you all night plus one!" shouted the young woman. She raised her hand, about to strike with her silk. Jaede was quite certain that the girl did not need any more coffee, but she wasn't going to intervene.

"Why don't you go and find your boyfriend, Duo?" he teased.

"He is not my boyfriend!" she shouted and stormed out of the office. Was it just Jaede, or did the girl seem like a normal teenager having an infatuation with a guy and not an alchemist at all?

The man finally relaxed and sat down in his chair. Gesturing to the other chair in front of the desk, he said, "My name is Colonel Roy Mustang. The woman that just left screaming about coffee is my niece Lt. Colonel Rhina Mustang. She's a little hyper but also one of the best in the military. The other woman was Lt. Riza Hawkeye, my assistant. If you ever need any help, those two women are your best resources."

"So what exactly am I supposed to do?" Jaede questioned. The caller summoning her here hadn't been very clear. She needed details.

"You may have heard about the deaths of high ranking military personal. You shouldn't have but you probably did," Roy started, grimacing as he thought of the latest murder.

"I heard something. I thought it was just rebels again. Nothing serious," the girl responded, knowing where this was going.

"Well, it is something much worse than rebels. We have reason to believe that these killings are carefully planned and organized by a group called J.A.S.P.E.R," he explained.

"Let me guess. You have set countless numbers of men to try and stop them and all have failed. Since you can't spare any more men, you hire me to go and do the dangerous stuff for you." Jaede sighed. Another hum-drum mission. No challenge.

"No."

That surprised her. She thought it would be a simple assassination mission. Go in and get the leader, get out. Group is left unorganized and leaderless. She collected the money and went home.

"Well, what do I need to do then?"

"A member of the military was recently captured and forced against his will to murder a man named Captain Thomas. You are to go and get him out of there**. Do not harm him**. Anyone else is fair game. Do whatever you feel is necessary. **Anything.** This is _very_ important. Any information you learn is valuable as well and will be rewarded with a bonus. Will you do it?"

Jaede smiled. Of course she would. It was a nice challenge, an opportunity to kick someone, and maybe some extra cash. She was very low at the moment.

"I'm in."

"Are you free this Saturday?"

"What?"

"I asked 'Are you-'"

"I heard what you said. No."

"Aww…"

"Don't you have a date with that Riza woman anyway?"

"You have a point…"

"Right."

"Do you have any relationship to Edward Elric?" The Colonel asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Who now?"

"Never mind."

"Getting back on task, where is this guy?"

"We have a lead. You'll have to hurry though. He never stays in one place for too long."

**--**

It was morning by the time Edward had reached a safe spot for refuge. He collapsed, exhausted, underneath the shade of the willow tree. He didn't sleep though. Every time he closed his eyes he saw the unseeing eyes of Captain Thomas, the blood sprayed on his face.

Hurriedly, Edward sat up and started to rub the dried blood off his face when he realized that he didn't have a sleeve to wipe it off. Damn! He settled with scratching it off with his hands. Ugh.

He was a mess. His hair was a tangle, he didn't have a shirt save for the undershirt he usually wore anyway, and on top of that he was now 100 percent a wanted man. He stayed under the tree for a day.

Things couldn't get any worse.

Then he felt a knife at his throat. His eyes flew open. Immediately, he slapped his hands together and transmuted his automail into a blade and aimed it at his attacker's throat. He stopped.

"Ah-_You!_" He and the girl exclaimed at the same time.

"This is going to be fun." The girl who looked like him said, grinning as she drew more of her knives.

Edward groaned and poised for a fight.

**TBC!!**

MH: Fun, fun, fun, fun!!! XD

Soluna: Just so everyone knows, I did not write the part where Roy asks Jaede out. It nearly made me throw up. I sent it to Maiwyn for editing and it comes back like this! Maiwyn, you are doomed.


End file.
